Ramblings of an idiot

I'm sure I'll be shunned.  I'll be forced to hide in my house, beneath the covers from the masses.  How dare I?  Don't know you know how wrong you are, they'll say?  Racist!  Evil!  Right wing christian conservative! Ignorant! These ideas in my head, they've been around for a while.  I've had my mind FILLED with these evil thoughts.  They were amplified on Dec 11, at my son's school concert.  They've reached the overall top of the jar, spilling over as of late. As I was at this holiday concert, there were no holiday songs that were sung.  Why?  Because 1 student was a Jehovah's Witness, and her family would be offended and 2 Jewish students were offended.  Granted, I'm not the most religious type of guy.  We attend the Methodist Church sporadically, and yes I teach sunday school and my kids attend it also.  However, I wouldn't be offended at a holiday concert if Hanukkah songs were sung, or if the limited albe...

On this normal 3rd Friday night of the month, we would be at group.  Baring our souls to others who've had the same pain or some variation of it.  This Friday is different, for many reasons.  Our leader, would only be there in spirit.  Our souls are torn due to tragedy, and overwhelmed with sadness.  My wife and I were unable to attend, due to circumstances beyond our control.  So I sit here, listening and watch youtube videos, most of slightly sad music.  My wife is relaxing in bed, trying not to cough up a lung.  My rugrats are watching Nick Jr and enjoying the yo-yo's bought at school. I sit here, lost in thoughts and reflections, like the Ghost of Christmas past.  I find life very frustrating at the moment.  Sales are slow, tempers are high.  People don't think, and when they do, they don't think about people.  I've found my fuse a shorter lately dealing with people.  I feel selfish comparing any pain I have to tho...

Gracious support above fear, above rage, and above sadness.  That shows a true moral compass of someone.  I have the pleasure, though for a short time, to know Mary Radatovich.  She helps countless parents, like Belinda and myself, cope with the struggling effects of infant loss and bereavement.  For those who know her, she is like an angel sent down.  She has been where we were and survived.  She gives us hope for those suffering now. Right now though, she is suffering.  Unfortunately, a dear friend of hers was affected by the Newtown, CT tragedy.  A young boy she knew personally was struck down, tragically by the shooter at Sandy Hook Elementary.  There could be more, I don't know.  From all I hear, it was a close knit community.  I'm sure she is struggling, as the whole community is, with the loss and the end of the innocence.  Yet I see the NY Daily News covering this story.  I see Mary right there, at someones side....

*Just a disclaimer here.  If I use your name, and you don't want me to, drop me a private line either on text or facebook.  I'll change the names of the innocent, so to speak.  Also, I use this as a forum for my thoughts in my mind.  Sometimes it takes minutes to do a blog, sometimes hours, and sometimes days.  While I might clean up the sentences and grammar to look acceptable, they are 100% of my raw emotions and feelings.  Yes, that might be too strong for some, but I'm not catering to anyone.  Yes, I appreciate feedback and advice.  If it goes with what I'm trying to do, I might even take it.* Last night, was the Memorial Candlelight service at Good Samaritan.  It was, quite frankly, an emotional, sad, happy, crazy draining night.  It continues the road that we started on February 1, 2012.  One I never thought possible, that I never thought we would survive, and thanks to people like Mary Radatovich, we are slowly pulling th...

While I'm sure it's oh so hilarious, this does NOT refer to the television show. I've been searching for that lately.  Online, various websites, magazines, internally.  Normal is a relative term.  What's normal to someone is totally against the grain for someone else.  What is normal, however, for a grieving family.  Is it the guilt a mother feels for failing to protect her child?  Is the feeling an older brother got for being jealous, or thinking it's his fault for getting mommy upset, that his sister went to heaven?  Is it the family pet, knowing that there's an emotional need in the family, tries to fill it by being by someone's side? Perhaps it's the overwhelming feeling to fill and fulfill every waking moment of the ones left behind with memories and good times.  For some, it's the random emotions striking you when you see a christmas ornament in a store.  A song on the radio, which turns the faucet on of your eyes.  Is it feeli...

I looked around and all I saw was spoiled kids.  Girls dressed like they should be on the street corner, 13 going on 30.  Boys swearing, smoking, and dressed like a wanabee ghetto superstar.  A world where Justin Bieber is considered an artist, where Twilight is considered quality cinema, and common sense is a lost art form. Manners have gone the way of the record.  The world is decidedly PC and every child has to win. We've forgotten what sportsmanship is.  How to deal with failure and injustice.  The lesson that life isn't always fair has been replaced with "I want my fair share."  Hard work has been replaced by hardly working.  The "Do not ask what your country can do for you" has been modified to "What have you done for me lately?" It's quite frankly, scary and depressing.  The kids walk around with clothes and phones that cost more than my car payment.  Attitude and rudeness permeate them like a piece of roadkill skunk.  Bu...

Some people mean well, they really do.  They just don't know.  Know what to say or do.  Last night, a friend of ours asked why we didn't decorate outside.  When we said we just weren't into it, he made a comment that it will help to get back into the swing of things.  Totally innocent comment, and meant well.  It's just not that easy.  As we drove away, taking the boys to look at Christmas lights around the neighborhood, my wife commented that he doesn't know what it's like.  I told her, of course he didn't, and hopefully he never will.  Cub Scouts is a commitment.  A commitment to the pack, to the community, and to your fellow scouts.  I understand that there are things that come up.  Family events, emergencies.  Why, though, overbook your child so to speak.  The scouts can be enriching and rewarding.  It teaches teamwork and camaraderie.  However, you can't reap the benefits when you sign them up for ...