Thankfulness

13 years ago on Thanksgiving, I lost someone near and dear to my heart.  As I grew up, I told myself I want my boys to have everything they need to make them great men.  Not materialistic, but in their hearts.  I hoped to be half the parent my mom was.  Today unfortunately, our family suffered a loss and my boys have to live through that feeling that I did so many years ago.  I am still thankful, that my mother, as independent as I am, still can calm me, whether it be a single word or look.  I am grateful for all the sacrifice she made as a single mom.  I hear my middle son read, and though he struggles, I watch him try and glad he makes that effort.  I watch my oldest, knowing most of this is easy as pie, and proud when he says he likes his tough teacher because she challenges him.  I watch my rainbow, with the wide curious eyes of youth, trying absorb all the information the world can afford him.

I watch my wife, with her eyes filled with sadness and regret, but pride and happiness also.  Wishing I could take her pain away, but then reliving moments of years gone by in my head and feel helpless myself.  I doubt if I can ever be the one to help everyone.  I can hope my legacy is enough, to have my boys succeed bigger and better than I ever can.  I hope they take the lessons of their uncle to give even when they have little, because there are those who have none.  I hope that the struggles of scouting, of small town politics, of late nights and missed dinners.  Of a missed first step or a first bike ride without training wheels, that comes an understanding. 

My legacy in this world won't be written in history books.  It will be shown through the heart of my boys.  Not just my flesh and blood, but the boys who stick through cub scouts and move on.  I can only hope someday, those boys will remember the slightly crazy cubmaster who maybe helped them learn, who had fun, and maybe taught them a little heart.  I hope that when it's all said and done, I took the lessons my mom gave me, and gave them out tenfold.  That when I pass, someone will take the time to say that I touched their heart and inspired them in some way.

Today, my wife and boys lost their uncle. This man cared for his family, his nieces and nephews, great nieces/nephews. Brothers and sisters, sons and grandchildren. His legacy, while not rich in monies, is rich in a helping hand.
This man had a heart the size of the sun, willing to give even when he couldn't afford to. God Bless you, Frank Davey. I'm glad your pain is finally over. I was once told that death isn't meant for the deceased, but pain for the living. While my wife, her cousins, and my boys are sad today, I'm glad to say I met this man. His goodwill inspired and will continue to inspire me. Some of his personality is what inspired my thoughts on this group, and will inspire me going forward. God Speed, and take care of M-Jay. She needs all the help she can to be our guardian angel, especially with her rambunctious brothers.

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