Ramblings of an idiot

This blog will be filled with random opinionated thoughts.  You might get offended.  I don't care but please don't bitch.  Your opinion can be recognized if formulated in an reasonable statement.  Otherwise, fuck off (and I mean that in the nicest possible way) On the radio today, I heard a statement from of all people, a sports commentator.  It gave me pause, and made me stop and listen.  This man, who is usually full of vitriol, said quite simply "As a black man, in the sports community, I have to wonder when we start taking responsibility for what we have become and stop blaming the world."  This statement though isn't just a blanket statement for the black community.  It can be used to describe the any class or ethnic person in this country.  Every one blames the world for what they have or don't have.  It's someone else's fault if they don't get what they want.  Politics is just grandstanding.  No-one gives a shit about ...

Reflection is of order.  On February 18th, we held a memorial service for our little girl, our angel.  On that day, we packed a church.  That day, people poured out of the woodwork, people we NEVER expected.  Also a ton of emails, texts, and phone calls from people who wanted to be there for us, but couldn't.   It gave me pause.  It also clarified, or magnified the people who WEREN'T there, who made no effort.  That by far, was the hardest speech I EVER gave. (though December's candle lighting was a close 2nd).  I'm more grateful for things I have, and less patience with others.  I have no use for baseless drama or stupidity.  I'm grateful for people like Dawn, Eliss, Katie, Mary, Tosh, Meghan, and countless others I don't mention (even when they don't smack me for bringing it into the gutter).  I have an incredibly understanding boss who has shown to be willing to bend over backwards for me if I'm down in the dumps.  My wife...

On January 31, 2012, I met my wife for an emergency OB appointment.  She hadn't felt the baby move since early the morning in the shower.  Little did I know how much our lives and our whole mental make-up would change.  As the nurse hooked my wife up to the monitor, she tried to find the heartbeat.  She swore she heard it.  Another nurse came in, and then the dr.    After a few minutes, they said we should go to the hospital as a precaution.  Sugarcoating it, was putting it mildly.  That day, was the day a piece of me died.  A piece of my wife died. That day, I changed.  You don't know sadness until you have to tell someone your baby died.  That you have to explain to a then 6 year old that mommy WON'T be coming home with a new baby.  There is guilt, fear, anger, and sadness.  You have a wife who STILL feels guilty, though in her heart she knows it's not her fault, her brain can't fathom that and she blames h...

In the last year, it has been a year of reflection.  Looking in the mirror, and seeing more and more of what I didn't like, literally.  I noticed by body was certainly in shape, round.  Seriously, I felt horrible looking at myself.  I decided to make a change.  Unfortunately at the same time, the bottom of my sales dropped out and my paychecks and incremental spending also went.  I couldn't afford it.  So, everyday I made myself disgusted looking at myself in the mirror, still indulging in the same stupid eating habits while feeling sorry for myself.  So, when it came to Christmas, and my grandmother yelling at me because I didn't ask for anything, I said "You can get me a gym membership." To make a long story short, she did.... the end...Ok, that won't work because I going to bore you with MORE details. I decided to pace myself at a reasonable pace.  3 days a week.  1 to 1 1/2 hrs a week.  I started off simple the first day, it...

From Wikipedia The Second Amendment ( Amendment II ) to the United States Constitution is the part of the United States Bill of Rights that protects the right of the people to keep and bear arms . It was adopted on December 15, 1791, along with the rest of the Bill of Rights. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that the Second Amendment protects an individual right to possess and carry firearms. [ 1 ] It seems that everyone is up in arms lately, no pun intended.  Comparing Obama to Hitler.  Saying the Sandy H ook tragedy was either staged and completely fake, or that it was set-up by the govern ment.  Seriously?  Really?  Wh ile I don't agree with the president on a lot of the fis cal issues, I don't see any effort to take away guns, I just see more regulations.  Of course, the real problem isn' t truly addressed nor does these actions trul y prevent another mass shooting.  Let's look at some of this possible exec ut ive orders...

This blog has been an outlet for me the last few weeks.  Of course, no-one has really seen the last few pieces I wrote as I wrote them, and then deleted them for public consumption.  However, a new year brings new resolutions.  A new clarity I suppose.  It means a new start, though the next month is painful and sad.  Upcoming memories of past moments.  February will be especially tough.  Again, I find myself cynical of people and their motives.  I doubt that will change.  There are things that do change though.  Personal behavior.  Once again, I am going to the gym.  Trying to get myself in a better shape and state of mind.  Maybe a better body will give me a better self image.  Maybe not, but worth a shot.  This biggest change, is this though.  The blog.  I had stopped really 'writing' after college.  I had a cheap blog type page before, filled with inane nonsense and stupid posts on it.  I v...

I'm sure I'll be shunned.  I'll be forced to hide in my house, beneath the covers from the masses.  How dare I?  Don't know you know how wrong you are, they'll say?  Racist!  Evil!  Right wing christian conservative! Ignorant! These ideas in my head, they've been around for a while.  I've had my mind FILLED with these evil thoughts.  They were amplified on Dec 11, at my son's school concert.  They've reached the overall top of the jar, spilling over as of late. As I was at this holiday concert, there were no holiday songs that were sung.  Why?  Because 1 student was a Jehovah's Witness, and her family would be offended and 2 Jewish students were offended.  Granted, I'm not the most religious type of guy.  We attend the Methodist Church sporadically, and yes I teach sunday school and my kids attend it also.  However, I wouldn't be offended at a holiday concert if Hanukkah songs were sung, or if the limited albe...