Randomisity
1: I eat every vegetable except peppers, though I will eat roasted red peppers or jalapenos in dishes
2: I am a Superman and Batman fan, and a mild comic book geek
3: I still watching professional wrestling and yes, I know it's fake
4: I am a die-hard Mets fan
5: I am a big fan of Meatloaf, the singer
6: I am a converted country rock fan
7: I listen to sad depressing music, and it makes me feel better
8: I use humor to cover up stress and anxiety that I feel
9: I used to write sports articles for the local town newspaper
10: You just read this for no apparent reason but to appease my ego... Thank you
Just remember, your opinions are more than welcome, good and bad. They are, as a matter of fact, appreciated because it helps me get better, or focus on what I need to improve on.
On a serious note, especially with #8. Those who know me, or just found this blog, or read it because I shamelessly plug (Again, thank you) know my family suffered a huge loss. While this blog is about me and my feelings, the loss extends way beyond me and my immediate family. My parents, my grand parents, aunts and uncles were affected. My wife's parents, cousins, aunts and uncles, and countless friends were too. I can't say how they act, how this affects them, or how hard it hits them, but please remember this is far reaching.
I still feel a lot of stress over this. My wife and I do the support group thing, and that certainly does help. There are just so many moments that require me to stop and think. I try to cover up. I try to keep people at arms length, feeling it unnecessary to burden them further. Lately, though, the holiday season has slammed into the world with the overwhelming imagery. I don't know how to face it. I feel bad knowing how much I used to love the Christmas season. I hate feeling like I burden people with my sadness and anger, including those close like my parents and grandparents. I keep thinking about what's missing this year. I've been told by those who experience it, that the first Christmas after such a loss, is the worst. That while the hole in the heart doesn't go away, you learn how to better deal with the pain. I sure hope so, because quite frankly, this sucks
“It really sinks in / You know / When I see it in stone"
2: I am a Superman and Batman fan, and a mild comic book geek
3: I still watching professional wrestling and yes, I know it's fake
4: I am a die-hard Mets fan
5: I am a big fan of Meatloaf, the singer
6: I am a converted country rock fan
7: I listen to sad depressing music, and it makes me feel better
8: I use humor to cover up stress and anxiety that I feel
9: I used to write sports articles for the local town newspaper
10: You just read this for no apparent reason but to appease my ego... Thank you
Just remember, your opinions are more than welcome, good and bad. They are, as a matter of fact, appreciated because it helps me get better, or focus on what I need to improve on.
On a serious note, especially with #8. Those who know me, or just found this blog, or read it because I shamelessly plug (Again, thank you) know my family suffered a huge loss. While this blog is about me and my feelings, the loss extends way beyond me and my immediate family. My parents, my grand parents, aunts and uncles were affected. My wife's parents, cousins, aunts and uncles, and countless friends were too. I can't say how they act, how this affects them, or how hard it hits them, but please remember this is far reaching.
I still feel a lot of stress over this. My wife and I do the support group thing, and that certainly does help. There are just so many moments that require me to stop and think. I try to cover up. I try to keep people at arms length, feeling it unnecessary to burden them further. Lately, though, the holiday season has slammed into the world with the overwhelming imagery. I don't know how to face it. I feel bad knowing how much I used to love the Christmas season. I hate feeling like I burden people with my sadness and anger, including those close like my parents and grandparents. I keep thinking about what's missing this year. I've been told by those who experience it, that the first Christmas after such a loss, is the worst. That while the hole in the heart doesn't go away, you learn how to better deal with the pain. I sure hope so, because quite frankly, this sucks
“It really sinks in / You know / When I see it in stone"
Yesterday, I was in the Christmas section. I saw baby's first Christmas ornaments, picked one up and started crying. I miss what should have been.
ReplyDeleteI am that way with musuc, soft rock, it makes me feel more and usually is what I listen to, to help me write in my blog. I too find humor, sarcasim helps a lit in my coping. I don't know how to respond to other's, Usually they don't either know what to say, but sarcasim fills that for me.
ReplyDelete